Outside

Outside is what they call it.  Outside seems like a magical place to be.  There are trees, flowers, and grass.  There are lots of bugs and other animals too.  Every day I look out the window and see things moving all over the place out there.  It seems so exciting.  I sit and look every day, wishing I could go out there.  When I hear the humans come home from work, I race to the portal which leads to the outside.  I sit and wait and stand as close as I possibly can.  When they unlock and open the portal, I carefully try to get a better glimpse of the outside world.  The humans push me with their feet and tell me "No" (they love that word).

The other day I tried to sniff my way to the outside and of course I was yelled at.  I was just trying to see that big flower across the grass that looks so tasty.  I know the humans don't want me to go outside.  They are trying to protect me.  They think I won't survive out there.  This may be true...

1) There are scary things outside like garbage trucks and kids.
2) Sometimes the wind can blow very hard, I might get blown away.
3) I have no thumbs
4) It rains outside, which is such a dreadful occurrence.  I can't imagine having to dodge rain drops in order to find a hiding place.
5) I don’t know what this is, but I’ve heard its horrible to run into… a skunk? 

Sometimes the temptations are too strong.  I see birds, leaves, chipmunks, and butterflies and I just NEED to chase them.  There are also fences and tables that I can jump onto... it's too much for a cat to resist.

Well... I caved into temptation.  The other day the girl had a lot of things to bring into the house from her car.  She kept going back and form through the portal.  So, I saw that she didn't close the portal all the way.  I just had to... I pushed the door open with my head.  I took a quick peek, and the girl was still at her car.  I walked out onto the front steps and sat there for a few moments.  I was waiting for her.  I missed her and was happy to see her so I wanted to wait.  I thought I was being sweet and that she would love to see me waiting for her.

Let me tell you how wrong I was.  The girl was not happy I was outside.  I was about to bolt off because I saw a leaf blow by  but.......the girl tricked me by telling me there was a treat inside... as I approached she snatched me up and threw me into the house.  The girl was very upset and scared that I went outside.  I even heard her say to the boy "we have to be careful with her".  I guess they really care about me.  But, I also love leaves and grass very much.  So, I guess we’ll see what happens in the future.

Then the girl said something rather peculiar... she said "good thing she's micro chipped".  Micro chipped?!  Say what?! I'm micro chipped?  They can track my every move!  Have you ever seen that move The Net… with Sandra Bullock (one of my faves).  That could happen to me now that I’ve been chipped.   Oh no, they must know that I was chewing on those papers in the office. I must go and hide the evidence before I'm caught!